We got the phone call on a Tuesday, but the story starts the weekend before that day. In our entire journey of trying to start a family, God has poured His grace out on my emotions and thoughts. This is a blessing from Him for sure. However - on this particular weekend - the journey, the waiting, the uncertainty was all beginning to weigh on me. Usually during these moments, I can turn to Clay and he will point me to the truth of God's Word and I am able to eventually turn my thoughts and feelings over to the Lord and trust Him with it all. But this weekend was different. Clay was there too. We didn't speak much about it, but what little we did it was clear we were both feeling the same thing.
Sunday morning I woke up and felt this heaviness beginning to weigh on me so strongly I wasn't sure I was going to make it through the day without crying. After church Clay and I went home and ate lunch before he had to go back up to the church. I had about 2 hours at home to myself, and all I could think about was this heaviness, our baby, our birthmother. I even walked into our kitchen and prayed, "Is this the week, Lord?" I quickly told myself to stop clinging to false hope and prayed and asked for more faith in His plan. It was then time to go back to church, and I drove over with tears welling up in my eyes. I texted a friend who has walked this same road with huge amounts of trust in God's plan, and just said I was having trouble holding it together and asked her to pray.
After church was over, I was returning a phone call to a neighbor who also happens to work in the adoption world. She had called about something completely unrelated, but at the end of our conversation asked how I was doing with the adoption. I wasn't planning to share with her about my feelings during the weekend, but I did. She said that she did not want to get my hopes up, but often times adoptive parents feel this way right before they are matched. She believes it is God pushing them to pray even harder for the birthmother and the decision she will be making. I didn't let myself get too excited about that. She encouraged me to call our agency and just check in and see what was going on with us, how we could pray for them, and if our book would be shown soon. I mentioned that fact to Clay, and he said we would talk about it the next day.
Right after this phone call, a dear friend texted me and asked if I wanted to go on a late night walk around her neighborhood. I thought this might be just what I needed. We walked and talked, but ended the night on her bed sharing about what God was doing in our lives. I was able to share with her about this heaviness, and she was so sweet and just prayed over me right there on her bed. She mentioned the same thing as my neighbor, and prayed for the birthmother and the decision that was going to be made. Again, I was not reading into either of these conversations.
The next day (Monday), I mentioned to Clay at dinner the idea of calling our agency just to check in with them. We don't get regular phone calls from them, and I was just dying to know something about anything that could possibly be encouraging to hear. Clay did not feel like we needed to call them, and asked me to just trust him. I agreed that I would submit to that idea if that is what he thought was best.
The very next morning (Tuesday), I was about to walk out the door to work when Clay called. He told me that the owner of agency had just called him. [What?? We had just talked about how we did not need to contact them the night before!] She was calling to ask some clarifying questions because she had a birthmom that was going to be viewing profiles that day and she wanted to include ours in the showing. All we knew was that she is latino and the baby is a boy. We talked it over, and agreed that we had no reservations about showing our book. We knew that she had a doctor's appointment around 11:30 a.m. and would look at books after that. The agency told us she might pick that day, or need a few days to think it over, or want to look at some more books.
It is not common for us to know that our book was being shown. Needless to say I was pretty much worthless all day at work. Every time the phone rang or my office door opened, I was sure it was Clay calling or coming to tell me some big news. I prayed for this birthmother all day, and my mind could barely think of anything else. We didn't know if we would hear if she didn't pick us, so by the end of the day when we hadn't heard anything, I was sure that we weren't picked. I left work and headed home for a few minutes before I had to meet a friend for dinner. I told Clay that I didn't even want to go to this meeting because I was just sad knowing that we didn't get picked. I decided that I didn't need to know anymore when our book was being shown. :) He encouraged me to go on to my dinner meeting and so I drove the 40 minute drive to meet my friend.
As I was pulling into the parking lot of the restaurant, my phone rang. It was Clay. I answered and he asked me what I was doing. I answered that I was meeting a friend for dinner -- didn't he remember that? Then he said, "Well, the baby is due November 25th." My heart stopped. What did he mean? What baby? Why would they have told him the due date when it wasn't our baby? My mind wouldn't believe it! I said, "What do you mean?" He said, "She picked us, Stace. The birthmom picked us. The baby is due on November 25th."
I was driving and trying not to cry and laugh and scream all at the same time. Clay didn't know much, but he knew that she had been shown books and connected with ours and picked us to parent her baby boy. They had told us when we were making our profile not to be stressed about making everything perfect - we were told to just be ourselves because you never know what is going to connect with the birthmother. We had done just that - and had included fun little details about ourselves throughout the book. One of the biggest things she had connected with was that I love Reeses' peanut butter cups -- because she does too! Oh how God has a sense of humor. Anyone who knows me well knows that I cannot resist all things peanut butter and chocolate. I will never look at Reeses' cups the same again! :)
I made it through dinner with my sweet friend. She was super gracious and allowed me to eat and run because I was so ready to celebrate with Clay. I made my way home, and then we talked about how we wanted to tell our families. We had not told our parents or families that our book was being shown that day, so they knew nothing. My mom has been asking me for weeks how I will tell her we were matched, if I would tell her, etc. so we decided to just drive to my parents house and show up unexpected. We called Clay's parents on the way to my parents house. They were so excited -- and they are getting their first grandson!
We got to my parent's house around 9:45 p.m. and they had no idea we were coming. I took a video of my mom coming to the door, and I'm so glad that I did! It is hilarious! I'm trying to get it uploaded on here because the world needs to see this video. It is truly priceless.
The next morning, we headed over to our agency to sign some paperwork and make things official. When we got there, our neighbor had already stopped by and dropped off this sweet present for us.
It was such a surreal few days. I'm still walking on air just thinking about all that is to come in the next few months. We are truly so excited about becoming parents, but more than that I am learning more and more of God's intimate involvement in our lives. He is so good to us. He is so near to us. He weaves greater stories in our lives than the greatest movie could ever tell. And I cannot wait to tell our son of the beginnings of his story.
And --- on another note --- keep looking for details coming about a fundraiser that some sweet friends and family are planning for us! We still need quite a bit of money to complete our adoption, and these sweet people are organizing a chili supper and silent auction for us on Thursday, October 17th. More details to come!
Sunday morning I woke up and felt this heaviness beginning to weigh on me so strongly I wasn't sure I was going to make it through the day without crying. After church Clay and I went home and ate lunch before he had to go back up to the church. I had about 2 hours at home to myself, and all I could think about was this heaviness, our baby, our birthmother. I even walked into our kitchen and prayed, "Is this the week, Lord?" I quickly told myself to stop clinging to false hope and prayed and asked for more faith in His plan. It was then time to go back to church, and I drove over with tears welling up in my eyes. I texted a friend who has walked this same road with huge amounts of trust in God's plan, and just said I was having trouble holding it together and asked her to pray.
After church was over, I was returning a phone call to a neighbor who also happens to work in the adoption world. She had called about something completely unrelated, but at the end of our conversation asked how I was doing with the adoption. I wasn't planning to share with her about my feelings during the weekend, but I did. She said that she did not want to get my hopes up, but often times adoptive parents feel this way right before they are matched. She believes it is God pushing them to pray even harder for the birthmother and the decision she will be making. I didn't let myself get too excited about that. She encouraged me to call our agency and just check in and see what was going on with us, how we could pray for them, and if our book would be shown soon. I mentioned that fact to Clay, and he said we would talk about it the next day.
Right after this phone call, a dear friend texted me and asked if I wanted to go on a late night walk around her neighborhood. I thought this might be just what I needed. We walked and talked, but ended the night on her bed sharing about what God was doing in our lives. I was able to share with her about this heaviness, and she was so sweet and just prayed over me right there on her bed. She mentioned the same thing as my neighbor, and prayed for the birthmother and the decision that was going to be made. Again, I was not reading into either of these conversations.
The next day (Monday), I mentioned to Clay at dinner the idea of calling our agency just to check in with them. We don't get regular phone calls from them, and I was just dying to know something about anything that could possibly be encouraging to hear. Clay did not feel like we needed to call them, and asked me to just trust him. I agreed that I would submit to that idea if that is what he thought was best.
The very next morning (Tuesday), I was about to walk out the door to work when Clay called. He told me that the owner of agency had just called him. [What?? We had just talked about how we did not need to contact them the night before!] She was calling to ask some clarifying questions because she had a birthmom that was going to be viewing profiles that day and she wanted to include ours in the showing. All we knew was that she is latino and the baby is a boy. We talked it over, and agreed that we had no reservations about showing our book. We knew that she had a doctor's appointment around 11:30 a.m. and would look at books after that. The agency told us she might pick that day, or need a few days to think it over, or want to look at some more books.
It is not common for us to know that our book was being shown. Needless to say I was pretty much worthless all day at work. Every time the phone rang or my office door opened, I was sure it was Clay calling or coming to tell me some big news. I prayed for this birthmother all day, and my mind could barely think of anything else. We didn't know if we would hear if she didn't pick us, so by the end of the day when we hadn't heard anything, I was sure that we weren't picked. I left work and headed home for a few minutes before I had to meet a friend for dinner. I told Clay that I didn't even want to go to this meeting because I was just sad knowing that we didn't get picked. I decided that I didn't need to know anymore when our book was being shown. :) He encouraged me to go on to my dinner meeting and so I drove the 40 minute drive to meet my friend.
As I was pulling into the parking lot of the restaurant, my phone rang. It was Clay. I answered and he asked me what I was doing. I answered that I was meeting a friend for dinner -- didn't he remember that? Then he said, "Well, the baby is due November 25th." My heart stopped. What did he mean? What baby? Why would they have told him the due date when it wasn't our baby? My mind wouldn't believe it! I said, "What do you mean?" He said, "She picked us, Stace. The birthmom picked us. The baby is due on November 25th."
I was driving and trying not to cry and laugh and scream all at the same time. Clay didn't know much, but he knew that she had been shown books and connected with ours and picked us to parent her baby boy. They had told us when we were making our profile not to be stressed about making everything perfect - we were told to just be ourselves because you never know what is going to connect with the birthmother. We had done just that - and had included fun little details about ourselves throughout the book. One of the biggest things she had connected with was that I love Reeses' peanut butter cups -- because she does too! Oh how God has a sense of humor. Anyone who knows me well knows that I cannot resist all things peanut butter and chocolate. I will never look at Reeses' cups the same again! :)
 |
| I'm so thankful we included these silly details in our profile! |
I made it through dinner with my sweet friend. She was super gracious and allowed me to eat and run because I was so ready to celebrate with Clay. I made my way home, and then we talked about how we wanted to tell our families. We had not told our parents or families that our book was being shown that day, so they knew nothing. My mom has been asking me for weeks how I will tell her we were matched, if I would tell her, etc. so we decided to just drive to my parents house and show up unexpected. We called Clay's parents on the way to my parents house. They were so excited -- and they are getting their first grandson!
We got to my parent's house around 9:45 p.m. and they had no idea we were coming. I took a video of my mom coming to the door, and I'm so glad that I did! It is hilarious! I'm trying to get it uploaded on here because the world needs to see this video. It is truly priceless.
The next morning, we headed over to our agency to sign some paperwork and make things official. When we got there, our neighbor had already stopped by and dropped off this sweet present for us.
 |
| Our first present for baby boy! |
It was such a surreal few days. I'm still walking on air just thinking about all that is to come in the next few months. We are truly so excited about becoming parents, but more than that I am learning more and more of God's intimate involvement in our lives. He is so good to us. He is so near to us. He weaves greater stories in our lives than the greatest movie could ever tell. And I cannot wait to tell our son of the beginnings of his story.
And --- on another note --- keep looking for details coming about a fundraiser that some sweet friends and family are planning for us! We still need quite a bit of money to complete our adoption, and these sweet people are organizing a chili supper and silent auction for us on Thursday, October 17th. More details to come!
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